1)
“So many PEOPLE!” the barbarian rumbled, scowling in all directions and waving his to-handed axe meaningfully to keep scurrying street urchins at bay. “They swarm like rats, or flies! All this STINK! Are they all…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) August 7, 2018

3)
…brain-addled, not to have sense enough to clean up after themselves? Dung where they LIVE! And eat! This is madness!”
“This,” the cleric explained wearily, “is a city. Your first, I presume?”
“And my last.”#epic fantasy“I believe that can be arranged. In fact, those men in uniform approaching us seem to have that very goal on their minds, by the looks on their faces.”
“What do the uniforms mean?”
“That they’re the City Watch. Lawkeepers. …#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) August 7, 2018

4)
…You DO know what that means?”
“Aye,” rumbled the barbarian. “I know YOU think it means I have to obey them. And I KNOW it means those stupid uniforms let me easily tell who to cleave into little pieces. Starting now.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) August 7, 2018

1)
“Vizier,” the Emperor snarled, “what’s your advice on THIS?”
The tall counselor looked down at the diplomatic pouch that had just been opened. And the reeking pile of wet dung it contained.
His expression remained calm.#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 13, 2018

2)
“My counsel, Your Supremity, is: check the address first. It may have been meant for someone else to receive.”
The Emperor glowered. “Done. There’s been no mistake.”
The Vizier nodded. “Then a measured response is indicated.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 13, 2018

3)
“You’re going to MEASURE this dung?”
“Oh, yes. And send precisely a hundred times as much, by weight, back to the—” The Vizier peered. “—King of Duinbarnde. Dragon-drop, on his head, as he crosses his courtyard. Fatal.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 13, 2018

4)
“And then Duinbarnde will march to war on us!”
“Oh, I doubt it. He’s even more hated by his populace than y—most rulers. They’ll cheer, fight each other over who’ll be the next king, and leave us alone for a bit.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 13, 2018

5)
“That’s…that’s brilliant!”
“Mere statecraft, Your Supremity. Allow me to remove this offensive…ammunition.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 13, 2018

1)
“Your offer is generous,” the old burgher agreed, “but we’ve no need for a lord protector. We have our blacksmith.”
The mountainous man on the horse sneered. “Some lout who hammers out sickles and plowblades all day has…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 14, 2018

2)
…time and battleboldness enough to defend a village?”
The burgher gestured down the lane, at the distant din of hammering from the smithy.
The adventurer dug in his spurs and headed that way. Contemptuously.#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 14, 2018

3)
He found the usual hot, cluttered room, with four strapping girls working a four-sleeve bellows, and one middle-aged, muscular woman heating what looked like a sword for a giant, then hammering it hard yet precisely.#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 14, 2018

4)
“You the blacksmith?” he bellowed.
The woman thrust her work back into the forge. “That some sort of trick question?”
Their eyes met. His cold, hers calm.
“Think you can defend this village?” he demanded.
“No complaints so far.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 14, 2018

5)
The adventurer sneered. “But have there been any attacks, so far?”
The smith sighed, drew out her work, hammered it thrice, then slaked it in a bucket of oil and commanded, “Ladies, show the man.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 14, 2018

6)
The quartet wordlessly left the bellows, went to the back wall, and pulled a cord. A tapestry fell away to reveal a wall studded with mounted heads. All manner of brutish-looking men, goblins, ogres, and worse.#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 14, 2018

7)
The adventurer stopped looking when he got to the third dragon head.
Which was about when he noticed that the four girls were all now holding cocked and loaded double crossbows that looked too big for anyone to lift. #epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 14, 2018

8)
He looked back at the smith. Who was leaning casually on a sword much larger than his own.
“Two days’ ride THAT way,” she said politely, pointing with an axe even bigger than the sword that came out from behind her so fast…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 14, 2018

9)
…the adventurer could only blink, “is the village of Thulbuckle. THEY need a lord protector.”
The adventurer regarded her for a long, silent time ere asking, “What happened to their last one?”
“He got imperial ambitions,”…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 14, 2018

10)
…she told him, “and foolishly looked in this direction. We had a disagreement.”
“And?”
“The head on the far right, at the bottom. Right beside the empty hook awaiting the next one.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 14, 2018

11)
“Thank you,” the adventurer said gravely. He nodded politely to her and then to the four crossbow-women, and rode away.
In the opposite direction from Thulbuckle.#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 14, 2018

1)
“What,” asked the bard, breaking off in mid-song to point, “is THAT?”
“That, lad,” rumbled the dwarf, “is what happens when an adventurer in armor falls from up there—in a rockfall that leaves him squashed flat.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 16, 2018

3)
The dwarf sighed. “Bit early in the day for deep philosophy, lad. Root questions of life, and all.”
“I,” the bard reminded him loftily, “AM a deep philosopher. Bard, remember?”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 16, 2018

4)
The dwarf scratched his chin, somewhere beneath his bushy beard, and said gently, “Ah. Forgive me. Slipped my mind, somewhere in all that bawdy singing. So, being as ye ARE a deep philosopher, go ask yon fallen rock.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 16, 2018

1)
“What,” asked the sorceress, “is THAT?”
“Killing draw,” said the barbarian, eyes intent on the “V” of thorn-hedge-crowned ridges in the valley below. “Drive your victims to the narrow end, until they’re squashed together.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 12, 2018

2)
The sorceress shuddered. “And kill them. Who’re the intended?”
“Us. The goblins are watching us now. If we descend out of the rocks, they’ll start herding us.”
“How EVIL!”
“Oh? We’ve done the same to herd beasts for centuries.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 12, 2018

3)
“That’s DIFFERENT!” the sorceress protested.
“Not to the herd beasts, it isn’t.”
“But we do it to eat!”
“So,” said the barbarian, “do the goblins.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 12, 2018

1)
When out of the castle I grandly ride
Armor and medals both flashing with pride
I recall every dragon and horrific monster slain
That until I ended them this realm did stain
But when the dragonfire doth blow
Elsewhere I hastily go

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 12, 2018

1)
When out of the castle I grandly ride
Armor and medals both flashing with pride
I recall every dragon and horrific monster slain
That until I ended them this realm did stain
But when the dragonfire doth blow
Elsewhere I hastily go

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 12, 2018

1)
“I never knew this door was here!”
“Well, if ye had, it wouldn’t be a SECRET door, now would it?”
“But…but this must open into the closet at the back of the queen’s bedchamber!”
“Oh? And just how would ye know THAT, hmm?”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 7, 2018

2)
“OhmygodsohmygodsohOHoh—”
“Lad, we ALL know where ye’ve been going of nights, this last month. No secrets escape the old guardsmen in THIS castle.”
“But…but…”
“Why didn’t we stop ye? We’re OLD, lad. We needed the break.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 7, 2018

1)
With a roar, the besiegers charged with their battering ram. The collision with the castle gates was thunderous. The gates not only shook; they wavered.
With a louder roar of exultation, the besiegers charged again.
BOOM.#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 12, 2018

2)
The gates toppled.
Atop the besiegers, crushing them.
When the din and dust were done, the watchers on the distant hilltop gaped in disbelief.
A second set of gates stood tall and unblemished, right behind the first.#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 12, 2018

3)
Amid all the cursing on the hilltop came this coherent sentence: “No wonder he was taxing us so highly! He had to pay for INSURANCE!”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) July 12, 2018