1)
Dragon shot out of blazing and fresh-riven keep
And soared great and terrible into the air
Its roars roused the distant city from sleep
And shot bewildered king up from his garderobe chair
He rushed across the room, quite puzzled and bare

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) November 5, 2018

2)
But when he got to the window, saw nothing there
So back to his eliminations, grumbling, he did repair
Then from diving dragon’s jaws, fresh flame did flare
Quite cooking the royal derriere
To roast king, no lesser dish can quite compare

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) November 5, 2018

1)
“My, my! FANCY armor! Nice work. With those holy symbols all over it, you’re a walking temple come-hither sign.”
“THANK you.”
“Aye, that’s wisest; take it as a compliment. You a paladin or something?”
“A holy knight? Ah, let’s…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 9, 2018

3)
…settle on SOMETHING. The gods walk among us, you know.”
“So I’ve heard, but DON’T try to take the last piece of meat when you’ve had your share by claiming godhood. You’ll get a good kick in your soft bits if you try, …#epic fantasy Holiest of Holy or not.”
“An unbeliever, eh?”
“No, I simply believe in fair sharing as a principle, first, over divine right to anything. Hierarchy of belief, see?”
“And what causes you, in life, to re-order your hierarchy?”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 9, 2018

5)
“OH, no you don’t! DON’T try to distract me from fair distribution of the meat, with threats or anything else. I know your game. Distract me with deep life philosophy, and grab meat out of turn. I’ve met your sort before.”#epic fantasy “Oh? And how did that turn out for you?”
“Where do you think the meat in this pan came from?”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 9, 2018

1)
“No, I DEFINITELY haven’t had any ale yet today, and yet THAT is JUST as definitely a PINK dragon. Flying over OUR meadow. Well, I never!”
“You invariably.”
“What?”
“Crazy and unusual sightings invariably happen in your…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) November 5, 2018

3)
“It was NOT meant as a compliment, FORMER Lord of the City.”
presence, Vralthus. I think you’re not just a powerful—if erratic—archwizard, I think you EXUDE magic, in a sort of field that twists and warps reality.”
“Oh, cease the flowery blandishments! You’ll quite turn my head!”#epic fantasy “Oh. Well, I’d take offense, but why bother? Yon dragon’s going to devour you in a moment any…”
“WHAAAA—[chomp]
“There. Well, devour the UPPER half of you, anyway. …#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) November 5, 2018

4)
… WHAT a mess. Say, dragon, if you’re so hungry, there’s an entire city of my critics THAT way. None of them will be a loss to the world. Oh, now, DON’T make that face. I’m sure SOME critics taste good. Well, fairly sure…”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) November 5, 2018

1)
“Good GODS! Father, does MOTHER know you ordered this sculpture?”
“Eh? Oh, the nude elf princesses going at it? That was her commission, actually.”
“WHAT?”
“Lass, lass, HOW long have you been alive? And you haven’t figured…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) November 5, 2018

2)
…out yet that shocking people is what your mother lives for? And if she can push you straight to appalled, she’s on top of the Palace for a WEEK. Heh. I love those weeks.”
“FATHER!”
“Honey, someday all of this will be yours.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) November 5, 2018

Dragon slain, heading home again
O how I shall wish I could fly!
For the queen will worry, so I must hurry
Or those damned bards’ll be telling her how gorily
And vividly, epicly, storily
I battled the wyrm, only to (inevitably, of course) die!

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 4, 2018

This castle always smells like a cesspit
But the monster-haunted forest looms all too near
And though I’m heartily sick of it
On the whole, I prefer being safely in here

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 13, 2018

1)
Madame Dragon sends her regrets
But she’s been unexpectedly delayed
It seems an invading army unaccountably strayed
So she had to devour them all

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 13, 2018

2)
And though this army was quite small
Excessive ingestion of armor gives her the frets
And much shrapnel out of her dangerously jets
So another more suitable appointment must be made

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 13, 2018

1)
“I don’t remember that shop being there yesterday.”
“Wasn’t. Used to be the potter’s, remember?”
“Yes, but I passed here at last light yestereve, and it was the potter’s THEN. This is…uncanny.”
“Magical. So they used magic.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 31, 2018

3)
… 2)
“I’m not sure everything uncanny has to be magical. After all, it’s a GOWN shop.”
“Aha! Don’t you remember Mariisa’s new gown, last feast? The effect was MAGICAL. There! Proof, incontestable!”
“You SURE you’re not a courtier?…#epic fantasy Because you SOUND like a courtier.”
“Oh? All grand and eloquent?”
“I was thinking more of the breezy ability to link two lies across a gulf of nothing, and pass it off as plausible.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 31, 2018

1)
“What’s going on down there?”
“I believe it’s an attempted invasion, Your Majesty. Outlander soldiers seeking access to the castle.”
“Can’t they read? Visiting hours are clearly posted!”
“Indeed, Highness. Perhaps illiteracy…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 13, 2018

3)
…IS involved. They may have misread a signpost some way back, and entered the wrong kingdom. However, now that they’re here, their intentions are clear. And clearly undesirable, from our point of view.”
“Well, yes. Soldiers…#epic fantasy are hell on larders, and even worse on wine cellars. And they ALWAYS eat with the wrong forks.”
“An undeniable tragedy, Majesty. Bordering on an outrage.”
“I’ve heard enough, Quilvaer. Inform them they are not welcome.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 13, 2018

5)
…“I doubt mere words will convey that, through all the shouting and screaming and explosions.”
“Oh, convey our message in the usual manner, then. Have the contents of the cesspool pumped up to the battlements and…#epic fantasy sprayed down on them with full force.”
“Very good, Highness. And if, nevertheless, they persist?”
“Send all of our bards up onto the ramparts at once, to sing to them. THAT ought to do it.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) October 13, 2018