1)
“Lord Wolf! Lord Wolf! The King demands your presence.”
“Demands, not requests? Hmm. Where is he at the moment? The Royal Bedchamber?”
“Yes, lord. It seems the Royal Bed broke.”
“Broke. I see. Truly, the King is mighty.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 5, 2019

2)
“He’s not in the bed alone, lord.”
“I didn’t think he was. Anyone I know?”
“I know not, lord. How many she-nagas have you made the acquaintance of?”
“That’s seldom a thing one tells, Lunder. Let me say: some. Did the King…#epic fantasy 3)
…seem, ah, SQUEEZED when he spoke with you?”
“Yes, lord.”
“Then I’ll hurry. And bring an axe.”
“Hmm. Hard to hide behind your back, lord.”
“Which is why you’re coming with me.”
“Danger pay, lord?”
“Of course. I’m cruel, not stupid.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 5, 2019

Here among the dead true knights, each on her own stout cord
Hangs also my last scruple, and the last time I knew dread
They died the day I heard, “Slay him. Honest men I can’t afford”
For it was my King who those words said

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 5, 2019

Still she goes on fighting, even when all witnesses are gone
So perhaps, at last, she is the one
Yet so many stars before hers have shone
And our dreamed-of freedom? Still unwon

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 6, 2019

Away and wildly weeping she now rides
For from her head the crown they have torn
And yet, some faint hope in me abides
That her royal line this realm hath not outworn

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 7, 2019

Dragonslayer, your past valor is but memory fast fading
We need new heroics now, that our land may be restored
The keeps are fallen, foul beasts every farm invading
Dragonslayer, we stand in need; will you be our shining lord?

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 3, 2019

We stand grim watch, as the dark deep night grows older
All joy has gone, soon the last of our hope will silently depart
And the banner resting furled on my shoulder
Will proclaim a land now fallen, gone, and torn apart

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 4, 2019

You swore you were to the King true and loyal
Barring the occasional late-night exception
But for coin enough, it now seems you’ll betray every last royal
It seems everyone’s loyalties and principles are mere deception

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 5, 2019

1)
“Lord Wolf, the King summons you! He…doesn’t sound happy.”
“I’m less than surprised. I wonder what he’s found out.”
“Found out?”
“Which of the many decisions made that will bring him unhappiness.”
“Oh. There’re a lot of them?”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 4, 2019

2)
“Of course. You can’t rule a kingdom without enraging the nobles and the wealthy merchants, deepening the smoldering hatred of the downtrodden workers, and making the king unhappy. If you try to keep the king too happy, …#epic fantasy 3)
…the other two groups get so angry that they find ways to exterminate the king. Then we courtiers inevitably have to start all over educating the replacement as to how the world works and their proper place in it. SO much…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 4, 2019

4)
…extra, unnecessary work.”
“Lord, shouldn’t you hurry? The King ISN’T pleased.”
“I’m giving him time to simmer down a trifle. You saw me pull the bell-chain when you came in?”
“Yes, Lord. Which means?”#epic fantasy 5)
“Which means the two doxies should be in his lap by now, giving him other things to think about. I’m nothing if not subtle.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 4, 2019

1)
“Lord Wolf! The envoy from Halantur is in the Royal Bedchamber, and we can see and hear crackling lightnings! The King is in danger!”
“I certainly hope so. Only a good scare is going to cure him of his lust for every pretty…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 10, 2019

2)
…face that comes with nice feminine curves attached.”
“But—but—”
“Palonder, CALM yourself. My spies informed me of the precise limits to Lady Drael’s sorcery. The King is suitably protected.”
“But what if something goes wrong?”#epic fantasy 3)
“Then Lord Varnel will burst out of the King’s wardrobe in the monster suit, roaring, and pounce on Lady Drael. And when she blasts him to bloody cantels and gore, the sleep gas vials all over the suit will shatter.”
“And?”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 10, 2019

4)
“And dreamland for all. Whereupon we go in and set matters to rights.”
“But what if the sleep gas puts US to sleep?”
“That’s why you’re going in first, Palonder. Then Lunder. Then Long Meg and her on-duty-tonight ladies.”#epic fantasy 5)
“Then you?”
“Then me. Someone must ‘see to’ Lady Drael. And we happen to be old friends.”
“Friends?”
“We’ve bedded each other, and she didn’t manage to kill me. Yet. So, ‘friends.’”
“That’s not the usual definition, lord.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 10, 2019

6)
“And how often do ‘usual’ and ‘Lord Wolf’ go together?”
“Ah.”
“Palonder, learn faster, will you? I’m getting older. The days pass, and I can’t stop them.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 10, 2019

1)
“No, NO draperies. We want the window big and bright and unencumbered. So the King can look out over his kingdom every day, and see the hired wenches a-sporting down on the royal lawns.”
“Hired wenches?”
“Yes. I hire them.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 3, 2019

2)
“But why?”
“To distract the King. While he’s sporting with a new lovely, he’s not making ruling decisions or coming up with new ideas. New ideas are DANGEROUS.”
“Why?”
“They mean change, and that threatens our current rank.”#epic fantasy 3)
“I…suppose, Lord Wolf. I LIKE the King.”
“So do I, but he’s a peril to be managed. His father understood the duties of a king, but this one’s got a brain. And worse, an IMAGINATION.”
“So what are the duties of a king, then?”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 3, 2019

4)
“To get drunk, rut, order executions when told to, and go hunting and riding and fall off and have to be comforted in bed. All the while leaving the decisions and real ruling to the professionals: us, the senior courtiers.”#epic fantasy 5)
“I see. Do the other courtiers know this?”
“Not yet, and DON’T tell them. They all know where the Castle vaults and the blank proclamations are, and people get trampled in stampedes.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 3, 2019

1)
“Skeevix, is that a human down there? Or is the sphere of many eyes bored again, and I’m seeing one of its amuse-itself illusions?”
*sniff sniff* “SMELLS human.”
“Good. Cover me. I’m going down.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 1, 2019

3)
“Goront, I don’t think you mean the same thing by ‘cover me’ as…never mind. Careful, now, humans are capable of just about ANYTHING. Why, just last m—GORONT! What are you DOING?”
“Trick question, Skeevix? What does it LOOK…#epic fantasy …like I’m doing?”
“Shapeshifting into a grotesque exaggeration of the shape of an overly-endowed human female. WHY?”
“I’m told human males find this irresistible.”
“Mayhap. But not if you shift right in front of them. …#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 1, 2019

4)
… They aren’t ENTIRELY stupid. Just MOSTLY stupid.”
“Is that why it’s yelling at me and drawing its sword?”
“Likely. It’s how they respond to most meetings that don’t involve throwing food or money at them.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 1, 2019

1)
“Skeevix, is that a human down there? Or is the sphere of many eyes bored again, and I’m seeing one of its amuse-itself illusions?”
*sniff sniff* “SMELLS human.”
“Good. Cover me. I’m going down.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 1, 2019

3)
2)
“Goront, I don’t think you mean the same thing by ‘cover me’ as…never mind. Careful, now, humans are capable of just about ANYTHING. Why, just last m—GORONT! What are you DOING?”
“Trick question, Skeevix? What does it LOOK…#epic fantasy …like I’m doing?”
“Shapeshifting into a grotesque exaggeration of the shape of an overly-endowed human female. WHY?”
“I’m told human males find this irresistible.”
“Mayhap. But not if you shift right in front of them. …#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 1, 2019

4)
… They aren’t ENTIRELY stupid. Just MOSTLY stupid.”
“Is that why it’s yelling at me and drawing its sword?”
“Likely. It’s how they respond to most meetings that don’t involve throwing food or money at them.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 1, 2019